Glume! - Jokes!

Inainte de culcare, sotul, cu o fata impasibila, ii aduce sotiei un pahar cu apa si un algocalmin. I le intinde fara o vorba.
-Ce-i asta? Pentru ce imi dai o pastila? intreaba sotia intrigata
- Este pentru durerea ta de cap, raspunde sotul
- Dar nu ma doare capul...!
-Ahaaa..!!! se lumineaza sotul

Before going to bed, the husband with an impassive face, brings to his wife a glass of water and a painkiller. He gives them to her without a word
- What is this? What for? asks the woman intrigued
- It is for your headache, honey, answers the husband
- But I don't have a headache...!
- Ahaaa....!!! the face of the husband brightens up

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Sotul si sotia la zoo, se apropie de cusca in care o gorila, apatica, manca fructe. Sotul fascinat, se uita la gorila, apoi ii spune sotiei:
- Am o idee! Scoate-ti bluza, sa vedem daca poti sa-i atragi atentia gorilei!
- Cum sa-mi scot bluza, aici...in public...ai innebunit?
-Hai ma pisi, scoate-ti bluza, sunt tare curios daca o sa reactioneze in vreun fel. Sotia, se uita in stanga, in dreapta, nu era nimeni, asa ca-si scoate bluza. Gorila se apropie de grilaj si incepe sa se holbeze cu interes la femeie.
- Auzi, stii ceva, scoate-ti si fusta!
Dupa ceva insistente, sotia convinsa, isi scoate si fusta. Gorila incepe sa dea semne de agitatie
- Ma pisi, daca iti scoti si sutienul, esti cea mai tare!
- Esti total nebun...cum sa fac asa ceva? Dar pana la urma, la staruintele lui, isi scoate sutienul.
Gorila incepe sa se agite frenetic, se izbeste cu pumnii in piept, apoi se arunca in grilajul custii.
Sotul, incitat la maxim, incepe sa-si implore nevasta sa-si scoata si chilotii.
- Draga, mergi prea departe, daca ma vede cineva...dar, ma rog, daca am ajuns pana aici...si incepe sa-si scoata chilotii.Gorila o luase razna definitiv. Se agita la maxim, scotea tot felul de sunete ascutite, se tavalea pe jos...Sotia era acum total goala, iar sotul, cu o miscare scurta o arunca in cusca gorilei.
- Na, acum spune-i lui ca te doare capul!

A couple, at the zoo, come close to the cage of a gorilla, who was eating his fruits, very indifferent.
The husband, fascinated, is looking to the gorilla, then he says to his wife:
- Darling, I have an idea! Why don't you take off your blouse, to see if the gorilla is gonna react in any way.
- How shall I do that, here, in a public place are you crazy?
- Come on baby, please take off your blouse, I am very curious to see what he's doing!
The wife is looking to the left, to the right, there is nobody, so she takes off her blouse. Gorilla is approaching the net of the cage, and starts to stare with a lot of curiosity to the woman.
- You know what? Why don't you take off your skirt also?
After some insisting, the wife is convinced to take off her skirt. Gorilla starts to be restless.
- Honey, if you take off your bra, you are the coolest!
- Are you insane? I'm not gonna do such a thing! But, after a lot of begging, she is persuaded. Gorilla starts to be very agitated, to hit his chest with his fists, to throw himself against the net of the cage. The husband, excited to the maximum, starts to beg his wife to take off her panties also.
- Dear, you go too far, what if somebody sees me...but, anyway, if I did all the rest, what a hell! and she starts to take off her panties. Gorilla is going totally mad. He is screaming, making all kind of sharp noises, rolling on the ground, agitated, etc. The wife is now naked. The husband, with a quick move throws her in the cage:
- Here you go! Now, you tell him that you have a headache!